Late in the hour I decided to commemorate the last day of 2012 by posing for pictures with four very special cats — my family’s two cats and my two. I took somewhere between thirty and forty thousand pictures this year, and what pictures weren’t of dead leaves were usually of them. Not excessive, by the way. I made these pictures sepia, because sepia means Special Memories Forever ™. Happy New Year!
June. No really, she likes it.
Maggie. This is as close as I could get to posing with her. I set the timer for as long as it could go (not super long) and tried to coax her near me. Look, I’m even offering her alcohol.
Rio — a stare-down with the wisest, most beautiful cat that ever was.
Layla. Well, Layla’s back end walking away, but better than good — good enough.
In the end, their portraits were very true to who they were. Layla is the cat version of a horse’s ass, June is sweet and pliable as Play-doh, Maggie is watchful and wise but a little standoffish, and Rio is basically like an honorary human that you can commune with.
Since Christmas, my life has been a whirlwind of window frost chronicling, cat badgering, fearless baking, and half-assed crafting and home improvement, I guess you could say. Here is what’s been going on.
Yesterday I made bread dough and today I baked the bread. Here’s how the bread looked before it became bread. It was a nervous, exciting time that easily could have ended in tragedy.
When it was done, it looked like bread. It smelled like bread. It tasted like bread. I was so proud. I wanted to tell everyone. Now I’m telling you.
Maggie lies on the floor like she’s dead. But she’s not.
Here’s a little insight int how my life works. About six months ago or more, my mom gave me this The Scream nightlight. Last month I bought new lightbulbs to put in it. This weekend,I finally tested the nightlight. It was just as cool as I dreamed it would be. I wanted to use this nightlight in my second bedroom because there’s no overhead light in there and it’s always messy and I don’t want to trip over things when I’m going in there to turn on the lamp and I especially don’t want to be grabbed by the demons that no doubt lurk in that bedroom. This picture is mostly for demonstration purposes, though. I’m not sure I want to have that light on in the room considering that this weekend and weekends past, I have spent millions upon millions of hours applying old, old dry pages from books to cover up the old, old, dry, cracked, buckling, ugly wallpaper that was in there and I’m afraid everything will start on fire. But please do admire my cool fake wallpaper and my cool nightlight.
I have been eating vegetables that are roasted because I’m fancy.